Yes, I Met the Dalai Lama | Gretchen Rubin [Skip to content](#content) [ ![](https://staging.gretchenrubin.com/wp-content/uploads/2022/07/gretchenrubin-logo-768x344.png) ](https://staging.gretchenrubin.com) - June 11, 2015 - [Spirituality](https://staging.gretchenrubin.com/tag/spirituality/) # Yes, I Met the Dalai Lama ![Dalai Lama walking under an umbrella with a group of people.](https://staging.gretchenrubin.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/06/dalailamamyphoto-e1662586280396.jpg) I’m in Sydney, Australia for the [**Happiness and Its Causes** ](http://www.happinessanditscauses.com.au/)conference. I’ve never been to Australia before, so that’s terrific, and I love being at the conference. I was also excited to be meeting the Dalai Lama. I’d been thinking about what question to ask him, if the opportunity arose. I’d decided to ask, “**What one habit do you think people should follow, in order to be happier?**“ But when the moment came, there were several people around, and I was worried about shoving my way into the conversation. I wanted to ask a question, but I felt sheepish — it seemed somehow very self-serving to do it. Also, I have a friend who’s a devout Buddhist, and I really wanted to present the traditional white scarf (a *kata*) to the Dalai Lama, to ask him to bless it for her and her family. So when I had the opportunity to stick my oar in, that’s what I did. One notable thing: very intense eye contact. As we all turned to go to the main conference event, I had that let-down, disappointed-in-myself feeling that I used to get when I was too scared to raise my hand in class. But then I had another opportunity for engagement. We all had to walk a fair distance to the conference hall, part of it outside, and the Dalai Lama (who is eighty years old, and in great shape, but still) grabbed my hand and leaned on my arm for the duration of the walk; [**Ruby Wax**](http://www.rubywax.net/) was on his other side. I didn’t take a single picture. I didn’t even think of it. Later, though I did get a bad photo, as you see. I hope that there’s some official photograph. One small thing really struck me — the same thing that struck me when I was clerking for Justice Sandra Day O’Connor, about forms of address. People constantly refer to the Dalai Lama “His Holiness.” Now, “holiness” is a big word. It would be quite something to be constantly associated with it. I remember being flabbergasted to learn that the accepted way to address Justice O’Connor was just to call her “Justice.” “Hey, Justice, the cert petitions arrived.” It’s quite something to be constantly associated with justice. I wonder if after a while, a person ceases to notice, or if being called by an honorific like that helps people to remember the high standard which they’re called to uphold. Other random observation: it’s surprisingly jarring to cross the international date line. #### YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE ![praying hand neon signage](https://staging.gretchenrubin.com/wp-content/uploads/2022/09/ybr-awm1hq4-e1663001236740-768x576.jpg) [What Did Flannery O'Connor Pray For?](https://staging.gretchenrubin.com/articles/what-did-flannery-oconnor-prayed-for/) ![Photo of a starry night](https://staging.gretchenrubin.com/wp-content/uploads/2022/08/Better_Than_Before_5-768x1152.jpg) ["Instead of Feeling That I'm Never Going to Finish...I Can See Large Chunks Getting Done."](https://staging.gretchenrubin.com/articles/instead-of-feeling-that-im-never-going-to-finish-i-can-see-large-chunks-getting-done/) ![Photo of a person on a beach at sunset](https://staging.gretchenrubin.com/wp-content/uploads/2022/08/Spirituality_9-768x512.jpg) [Do You Have Any Favorite Quotes? I Sure Do.](https://staging.gretchenrubin.com/articles/do-you-have-any-favorite-quotes-i-sure-do/) #### DISCOVER MORE # Like what you see? Explore more about this topic. - [Spirituality](https://staging.gretchenrubin.com/secondary_tag/spirituality/) # Interested in happiness, habits, and human nature? From renowned happiness expert and *New York Times* bestselling author Gretchen Rubin, the “Five Things Making Me Happy” newsletter is one of today’s most popular newsletters. You’ll get a weekly round-up of what’s making Gretchen happy, as well as practical tips, research, and resources about how we can make our lives happier, healthier, more productive, and more creative. Email Submit Manage Cookie Consent To provide the best experiences, we use technologies like cookies to store and/or access device information. Consenting to these technologies will allow us to process data such as browsing behavior or unique IDs on this site. Not consenting or withdrawing consent, may adversely affect certain features and functions. Functional Functional Always active The technical storage or access is strictly necessary for the legitimate purpose of enabling the use of a specific service explicitly requested by the subscriber or user, or for the sole purpose of carrying out the transmission of a communication over an electronic communications network. Preferences Preferences The technical storage or access is necessary for the legitimate purpose of storing preferences that are not requested by the subscriber or user. Statistics Statistics The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for statistical purposes. The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for anonymous statistical purposes. Without a subpoena, voluntary compliance on the part of your Internet Service Provider, or additional records from a third party, information stored or retrieved for this purpose alone cannot usually be used to identify you. Marketing Marketing The technical storage or access is required to create user profiles to send advertising, or to track the user on a website or across several websites for similar marketing purposes. - [Manage options](#) - [Manage services](#) - [Manage {vendor\_count} vendors](#) - [Read more about these purposes](https://cookiedatabase.org/tcf/purposes/) Accept Deny View preferences Save preferences [View preferences](#) - [{title}](#) - [{title}](#) - [{title}](#) Manage consent # Subscribe to Gretchen’s newsletter. Every Friday, Gretchen Rubin shares 5 things that are making her happier, asks readers and listeners questions, and includes exclusive updates and behind-the-scenes material. Email Submit ; ![](https://www.facebook.com/tr?id=1375714196636303&ev=PageView&noscript=1&cd%5Bpost_category%5D=Articles&cd%5Bpage_title%5D=Yes%2C+I+Met+the+Dalai+Lama&cd%5Bpost_type%5D=post&cd%5Bpost_id%5D=34841&cd%5Bplugin%5D=PixelYourSite&cd%5Buser_role%5D=guest&cd%5Bevent_url%5D=staging.gretchenrubin.com%2Farticles%2Fyes-i-met-the-dalai-lama%2F) [x](# "Close optin form")Subscribe to Gretchen's newsletter Every Friday, Gretchen Rubin shares 5 things that are making her happier, asks readers and listeners questions, and includes exclusive updates and behind-the-scenes material. We promise not to spam you. You can unsubscribe at any time. Invalid email address Thanks for subscribing! [x](# "Close optin form") ![Blue and yellow pens on blue background](https://staging.gretchenrubin.com/wp-content/uploads/2022/09/cropped-cropped-DSC5980-scaled-e1663786433795.jpg) Join more than One Million Subscribers # Get happiness delivered to your inbox. From renowned happiness expert and *New York Times* bestselling author Gretchen Rubin, the “Five Things Making Me Happy” newsletter is one of today’s most popular newsletters. You’ll get a weekly round-up of what’s making Gretchen happy, as well as practical tips, research, and resources about how we can make our lives happier, healthier, more productive, and more creative. [Privacy Policy]() Invalid email address Onward! Thank you for subscribing.